I gave up booze for 100 days and the world did not crumble or self-implode!

Anyone who knows me well knows that I love whiskey-with a passion even. In that I am able to distinguish different characteristics of whiskeys and I know what I like and that I am starting to lean towards ryes because they are not too sweet and have a pleasant bite. Imagine my despair when I learned that a new Paleo-AIP lifestyle I intended to jump into meant no alcohol for at least 90 days, while I was going through the elimination phase. Giving up coffee and whiskey (in that order!) were nightmarish thoughts for me back when I decided to do this in March. I started my challenge in early April--my first full day was April 4th and I graduated on July 12th. I caved to the coffee cravings on Day 9, but thanks to Helene who runs Lose 'da Booze and her amazing, supportive FaceBook Group of the same name, I never caved to the booze cravings and I joined her 100-Day Lose 'da Booze Challenge.  (The group is closed and you will need to let Helene know your intent when requesting to join.) To be honest, I didn't crave booze nearly as much as I thought I would, but the times I was craving, this group was there for me in spades. I've never encountered such a non-judgmental and supportive group of strangers in my life. They have become my second family in the past 3 1/2 months!

Although I want this post to be mostly about what I gained from my 100 days of sobriety, I also need to tell you quickly what I gained by the overall Paleo-AIP lifestyle. I have lupus and Sjogren's as well as secondary autoimmune issues and my pain levels have decreased (though I do have a stress injury to my left foot & ankle which did not improve), and best of all, my energy levels have increased by a huge amount. I will be staying on a modified version of Paleo-AIP, probably for the rest of my life because it has worked so well. Additionally, I lost nearly 20 pounds! I have 14 more pounds to lose, but I'm in a healthy weight range again.

What I learned by giving up booze for 100 days:

• I am much stronger than I ever gave myself credit for.
• I am not psychologically addicted to alcohol, and the physical addictions might not have been there either, at least not as strongly as I originally thought--though I was craving EVERYTHING the first few days and had a terrible headache because I was also not consuming sugar, caffeine, flour, etc. (Hence coffee coming back into the picture on my 9th day.)
• There are so many people impacted negatively by alcohol. They come from all corners of the globe and many of them are high-functioning professionals who wake up every morning, go to work, have families, etc. The old skid-row image of yesteryear is not an accurate picture.
• You can do anything you put your mind to. Don't overthink anything, just move forward and keep your eye on your goal.
• The shame aspect is something I'm still working on, but as with everything in life--someone out there understands where you are and supports you no matter what. The shame was lessened a few dozen decibels when I realized I wasn't alone and that there were so many others who were experiencing a similar struggle.

My goal was not to completely give up alcohol forever. I simply wanted to feel and be healthier. I started the challenge to coincide with a vacation to Bourbon County, Kentucky. I am drinking this weekend. Here is what I note is different after graduating from the 100-day challenge:

• I'm drinking whiskey this weekend because I love the taste. I'm craving the taste, not the intoxication now!
• When I felt myself getting that warm afterglow of drink yesterday, I was happy to stop where I was. I didn't jump into the mindset that "more is better" because--it is really not.
• Looking back to the last time my drinking took an upswing--I was self-medicating to numb my feelings. I lost half of my family the moment I told on Monster and disowned him. I will probably blog about that more in the future, but suffice it to say that I still lost half of my family at the end of the day. Maybe they were never a huge part of my life, maybe they never loved me anyway (they never showed me any shred of love, even as a little girl) and maybe they don't give a squat about what Monster did or didn't do. It doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things and drinking doesn't change it, nor does it make me forget --other than fleeting drunken lapses of memory. The ex-family and Monster are NOT worth a hangover. I've come to realize that I deserve better.

What does my future hold where alcohol is concerned? I will be moderating and testing my new relationship out with 'da booze until the Tuesday after Labor Day weekend. Then, I will jump into another Lose 'da Booze 100 Day Challenge. I know this is the right path for me and I'm happy to be sharing this journey with my new friends.